Another Chance
by hiei1317
Summary: Smith watched his copy lose. He was trapped but he was sent free. Turned away by agents and loathing humans, who will take him in? I'm not that great at summaries please rr! rated pg-13 for later language and for violence! FINISHED!
1. New Beginings

a/n: my first shot at Matrix! I really like Smith but I did change him to fit the story.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the matrix or it's characters (or do I? mwahahahaha) (nope I don't!)  
  
I'm in blackness. Nothingness surrounds me. I've been falling for what seems like eternity in a bottomless black pit. I claw at the non- existent walls and try desperately to stop. I want to either hit bottom or climb back up, but I can't. My body is nothing in this place. I am a virus in a ghost's world, unable to touch, smell, or hear anything. The only good part is that the smells are gone. The sounds are gone. No longer must I listen to the constant drone of the humans' cage, no longer must I fight those weak humans, and no longer must I fight Mr. Anderson. I feel freer when this thought comes around. I always know that when I hit bottom, Mr. Anderson won't be there with me.  
Wait! Now there is a light. I see a light. I want to be where the light is, where images of the past can not find me, where I can be alone. I reach for the light. I keep getting closer, and closer. I seem to now be falling towards the light. It's right in front of me. I can just reach it now, and then I grab it. I hold the light and everything starts to change around me. There's a green code now. The sign of the Matrix. I can feel the place that was nothing, now transform, evolve, back into the place where I was once trapped. My body is now returning to the one place I never wanted to have to return to. I'm back in the Matrix, and I can't change that. I am powerless to stop it. The green has stopped. It has been replaced by the towering buildings of a city, the people that inhabit it, the smell and sounds that always accompany it.  
Why? Why must I always come back here? Why must I be forced back to the place that I was created, but never belonged? I look down and notice that my suit has been perfected and that I am looking below my sunglasses. I have been restored, like an agent would be. Is that why I was brought back? To be an agent again? I that my one true purpose?  
It can't be! My purpose was taken from me by Mr. Anderson. That day that we fought, he knew it wasn't us. It was him, but out there, fighting for me, was the one copy that I knew I would never be the boss of, the copy that the Oracle was within.  
Then I notice where I am. I look up to see the building in which I was deleted. The building where the One was born, and where I died. How ironic. Mr. Anderson gains power there, and I lose it. It's not hard to believe, just ironic in the way it is told.  
I must get away from here. If I am an agent I must find one of the others. Brown. Jones. Jackson. Johnson. Anyone of them, I had to find someone.  
I started to run. I ran head on into people and they would yell, but I had to keep running. If you keep going, at the right speed, the past leaves you and the present can't keep up, all you need, all you have then is the future. That's what I want right now, that's what I need right now.  
I run a good five blocks when I stop. I see him. Agent Brown is standing right there, in the middle of the street, staring right at me. He looks very displeased and I start to worry. He was always the smallest, but he might have been even more deadly then I.  
He stares at me with his emotionless eyes hidden behind the dark agent sunglasses. I feel the heat, and it burns me. If looks could kill I would have died first thing I saw him. He draws his gun and starts to fire. My agent speed easily allows me to dodge bullets, but I'm like a deer in head lights, I can't move. I stand in his wake and then I feel something hard hit my side. Not a bullet, but a person. He pushes me to the ground, and all I feel is a bullet grazing my left shoulder and my right shoulder dislocating as I hit the ground.  
I turn to see who has saved me and I can't move. My thoughts stop. Seraph. The Oracle's and Sati's guard. I must be dreaming. I must still be falling. He grabs my arm and forces me to run with him, not caring about the pain he caused when he pulled at the dislocated shoulder. I can feel the pain rising in me, like water boiling. It slowly rises to the point where I can't even move. Luckily Seraph takes notice and stops, turning to me.  
"You know we must get you to safety?" he asks, even his voice is in a hurry. I nod yes in response.  
"Then you also know that I must take you to the Oracle?" Once again I nod yes.  
He slowly reaches to touch my dislocated arm. "Can you move it?" I nod no this time.  
"Damn it," then rips his sleeve and wraps it round my opposite shoulder, careful not to hit the bullet wound and makes a sling for my right arm. "This should do until we get back."  
"Thank you," the words are foreign but I feel obliged to respect my savior.  
"There will be time for thanks and stories later, now we must get back," and I know he's right.  
I also then realize that we are close to our destination. I sigh but keep running. We reach the place in a matter of minutes. He leads me in and I understand that I must follow him, show that he is in control, for if I don't, there could be a price to pay. I hunted him once, and I nearly killed him before he beat me and got away. I know he can beat me, but I have no desire to fight. I feel like I have been awake for months and all I feel like doing is laying down to sleep.  
He leads me up a flight of stairs and I know that we are drawing even closer now. I can feel that she is near. I know that she is because part of her is within me, she is my mother. I know that I couldn't trust her when I was an agent, but who knows now? If she sent Seraph after me she must want me alive. I am spooked, but I will not worry about such things for more than a few seconds, she has shown that she wants me alive and that is enough to know that for now, I am safe.  
He opens the door when we finally get there and rushes me inside. I know that there are many things that surround me now that I shouldn't even be near. I know that I have destroyed them before and could do that again. But I am here now, and that can not be changed.  
There she is. Sitting on the couch, awaiting my arrival. She sits so calm. She is so forgiving. She motions for me to sit next to her and I obey. I don't like to obey others, but what other choice do I have? I sit down and she looks at me. She tries to remove my sunglasses. I recoil. My sunglasses are all that define me, all that protect me, but she insists and I am powerless to stop her. She folds them and places them on a table beside her. She knows now that I am afraid, she sees it in my eyes, and she embraces me. It's a light embrace, but I then give in. She willingly allows my blood to stain her clothes, just to keep me safe in her arms. She holds me next to her heart, and I know that she cares. I hated her as an agent, but she now takes me in, and I am thankful for this.  
"It's alright now, shh, it's okay now, I'm here, my Smith, I am here," she coos and comforts me.  
"I know this is wrong," I think aloud.  
"There is nothing wrong about pain, it shows us that we are all just the way we need to be," she answers me.  
"No," I protest, "You and I were enemies and now we aren't. I killed, you defended those who I missed and prevented further death on my hand, you were good, and I was evil."  
"No, you WERE an agent, NOW you are the son you should have been all those long years. There is nothing wrong with you. I should know, I am your mother."  
I know this, I always knew that we were mother and son, but I hated the thought as an agent, now I hate myself. She releases me and leads me to a bed.  
"Thank you," I reply to her un-spoken kindness.  
"You're welcome," she replies, "Just lie on your back; I will have Seraph tend to your wounds as you rest. Sleep now, close your eyes; you have had a hard time back from the looks of things. I'll be here when you wake up, and so will any answers that I can provide. Hopefully you can provide answers too."  
I nod and then lay my head back. It is a matter of seconds before I fall into a very comforting sleep.  
  
a/n Please review!!!!! I only continue if you review! 


	2. Talking and Remembering

a/n: well overnight I was bombarded. My first story gets only two reviews for nine chapters. My second story gets one review a few hours after posting it. This one gets four reviews in a total of 8 hours. Those made me feel good so here you all go, another chapter. Might I add before we start that I would like to recommend my other stories too.  
  
I awoke the next day and looked around. I hadn't really looked at the room the night before, but now that I was, it was amazing. There were blue shades over the windows and behind them blue gems that reflected the sun and caused the room to look like it was underwater. I saw that there was a lamp that had a similar decoration idea on a wooden desk next to the bed. There was also a digital alarm clock, telling me it was almost noon.  
  
I had fallen asleep late and slept in, that was nothing like me. Well, that is nothing like how I used to be, I could easily change that now, though.  
  
I looked down and saw that I was in a sling, this time a real one. I also noted that the shoulder that had been shot was in a bandage that looked clean enough to comfort me that it was healing.  
  
I stood up and stretched. I knew that if I walked out, out into the one place people would take me in, I might still be unwanted by some of them. I couldn't blame them. When I had my power I used it to scare, to bully around anyone who dare get near me, anyone in the past that had treated me like I was weak. I hated that above everything, and yet just last night I was held by the Oracle. The one thing that I could ever wish to hold to, and yet the one person that I never could stand in the past, and am still getting used to now.  
  
I decide to walk out into the main area. If I'm going to be ridiculed and tortured by my past, in the present, I may as well go down fighting, not cowering and afraid.  
  
When I open the door I see that Sati is sitting with the Oracle, reading over her shoulder, while Seraph stands out on the balcony of the apartment. I always wondered why he seemed to look out there so much. He always stood, like a gargoyle, watching the people below, until he had to come inside and help the Oracle or Sati. The Oracle noticed that I had come out and turned to me. She smiled, but when Sati saw me she got nervous.  
  
"Oracle, you didn't tell me he was here, you said we had a nice guest," she was worried and not hiding it from me. She knew what I could do, yet I had to smile, a soft smile at that. The Oracle had lied; she said that I was nice; I had never heard such a good lie. Or maybe she knew something that I didn't.  
  
"Come now, Sati, he won't hurt you," the Oracle's kindness was so unnerving, she was saying things that weren't certain, and yet was confident enough to not falter, always trusting that she knew every move that could be made.  
  
"Are you sure, Oracle?" Sati was starting to lighten up, if she was in no danger she was very forgiving.  
  
"Yes, Sati, I'm sure," she was too confident in her words for my liking.  
  
The next thing I knew I had a girl attached to my leg. Sati had run over and started to hug me. I had never been one for things like hugs or kisses, but she was still young and innocent, this was her way of saying everything nice.  
  
The Oracle started to giggle. Sati did finally let go, and when she did she ran over to the second couch and invited me to sit. I was still tired and would gladly take any seat.  
  
"So, how'd you sleep?" the Oracle was straight into her questioning. She was always out right with everything; she just started small and built.  
  
"Sati, would you like to go for a walk?" Seraph asked.  
  
"Yeah!" Sati jumped up and the two left without another word. I knew that he was told to do this at some point when I was asleep.  
  
"I was fine, I felt like I hadn't slept in months, it was nice to finally rest," I answered, being completely open, something else I had never been in the past.  
  
"That because you maybe haven't. You've been gone for six months you know?"  
  
"It's been that long?" I am exasperated, six months and I still feel the scars fresh on me. The scars of my death.  
  
"Yes, and I would like to know, where were you all that time?"  
  
"I don't know," I was being completely sincere, "I remember a pit of blackness, so dark I couldn't see my hands in front of my face. I remember there were no walls, for when I tried to reach out and grab hold of one, I only touched air. Then I remember another light. I knew light brought death, but it also takes me to new places, and anywhere was better than that place. I grabbed the light, and it pulled me back into the Matrix. The place there aloud no healing, the wounds of battle and death still burn inside me you know."  
  
"I can only imagine, Smith, I might have lost the war for you, but you're still the one who got the scars. I remember that Neo would punch me and that I would feel nothing, I imagine that it was you who felt the blows."  
  
"Yes it was," I answer, why was I being so nice, "I felt like shit afterwards, I couldn't move, I felt like just dieing right there, but I held on because I knew Mr. Anderson was gone."  
  
"How is that good to you? I understand that you two were always enemies, but how DID you feel? Knowing that everything that was keeping you alive had to do with him, knowing that without the evil, good is nothing, and vise versa, how did you feel?" she was asking a tough question to answer.  
  
"I felt," I was faltering and didn't like that, "I guess I felt complete. I knew that I only came back because Mr. Anderson couldn't survive without the opposite. I knew that well, but that time it would him coming back for me. The One would be returning for an agent. Neo would be returning for a virus."  
  
The Oracle giggled again. "Was my answer amusing?" I was confused.  
  
"You called him Neo. That's the first time, even when I was your copy you never spoke about him using that name." She was amused by this?  
  
I had to know something. If she could remember being me maybe SHE could answer this, "Did it hurt when you became me?"  
  
"It felt like my code was being ripped bit by bit, and then it stopped and I felt cold. I knew that I had power, but I felt incomplete, my code had been torn."  
  
I sighed. I knew that I couldn't live with this, this burden that was causing me to slowly fall back into nothingness. I was soon going to be alive and purposeless again. Why had she brought me back?  
  
It was a while before Sati and Seraph returned. They were back around three in the afternoon. Seraph looked like Sati had given him a good workout. I smiled at the thought of someone Sati's age making Seraph look so weak.  
  
I was reading the news paper. I was still tired. Sati went into her room and then came back out. She was hiding something behind her back. She approached me and then stood there. I lowered the paper and she gave me a command, "Close your eyes and hold out your hand." SHE was commanding ME.  
  
To not start a fight with her I did as I was told. I felt her place something in the palm of my gunshot hand. She apparently didn't know about the wound, I winced, but she didn't notice. "Ok, open your eyes," she was commanding me again.  
  
When I opened my eyes there was a colorful braided bit of string in my hand.  
  
"It's a good luck bracelet. When someone gives it to someone else the receiver has good luck," if only what she said was true.  
  
"Thank you," I replied. She smiled and then climbed up onto the couch and hugged me again. She didn't understand what this was doing to me. She couldn't understand how this was affecting me. This contact, this constant invasion of my space, it was tearing me apart. She was damaging me without knowing it. I could slowly feel everything that I was once being torn away and replaced by something new, new and more depressing.  
  
She couldn't know that she was hurting me, but she was. And there was nothing that I could do to stop her.  
  
a/n: please review!!!!! 


	3. Simply Here

a/n: I know that this was short but I wanted to test what I made happen before I posted the next part which I promise will be longer.  
  
Dinner time rolled around. There is silence at the table. Even the usually perky Sati is being quiet. Is this my fault?  
  
Sati is eating quietly, finishing off her chicken and rice. The Oracle has finished and is now clearing the table, she insisted on eating ahead of time. Seraph was programmed to never HAVE to eat, but he is still drinking tea. I never have to eat either, but with my injuries I need nutrition and that won't come from just a drink. I sit around, wondering why the table is so quiet, then finally a conversation starts.  
  
"You're wearing the bracelet," Sati notices. It is true. I decided to wear it. Not for the good luck, just to make a good impression, I was always big on making a good impression.  
  
"Yeah," I blandly anwer.  
  
"Why? I didn't expect you to," she was so innocent.  
  
"Sati," the Oracle scolded.  
  
"Sorry Oracle. But it's true! I really didn't think he would wear it," she was pleading to not be in trouble.  
  
"It's alright," I speak in her defense, "I understand completely.  
  
"But still," the Oracle sighed, "It's not something to be said about someone.  
  
"Once again, I understand what she means. If anything she should keep going. I deserve everything that she can say," I'm not lying. I do deserve what she tells me. I really know that I shouldn't be here, I know that I shouldn't have been brought back, but I was and I was ready to hear all the punishment this world could give me, I deserve every bit. There's nothing else to go on for.  
  
"Smith," the Oracle is glaring at me. I lower my head, brace myself for what's to come.  
  
"Stop," she pleads. 'Stop'? She wants me to stop scolding myself. She wants me NOT to get punished?  
  
"What?" I am so confused.  
  
"Stop being so hard on yourself. You were brought back for a reason. What the reason is is beyond me but I still know that there is a purpose and to serve your purpose you have to hold your head high."  
  
"Why?" I don't have to, she just wants me to.  
  
"Because, if you keep this up you're not going to ever reach your full potential," she sounded confident enough.  
  
"Full potential? I was there as an agent! I can never be that person again," I know that this isn't a lie. I could work hard, but never could I move the way an agent moves, not in this form, not if I freeze when I see the barrel of a gun pointed at me.  
  
"Smith," she sighed. What was I doing NOW.  
  
She walked over and put her hand on my left shoulder. I winced and she withdrew. She doesn't know it, but that didn't hurt, I just didn't want her to touch me.  
  
"I'm sorry," she started.  
  
"No, don't be, it's my fault, it always is."  
  
Sati now is over by Seraph, worried from what I can tell. Seraph seems emotionless, as always. The Oracle is staring at me.  
  
I don't care anymore. I don't want to be around these people. If I can't leave then I can shut them out. I push the table away, hard. It moves a good two feet. I'm not even happy that I accomplished this feet, I just want to get away, away from these people.  
  
The Oracle is known for being so smart, knowing everything. If she knew everything though, she wouldn't have touched me; she would have stopped and let me keep taking the fall, the blame that I deserved.  
  
I run into the room they gave me and slam the door shut. I'm sure that they heard that, they can now know my anger, but they will never know my pain.  
  
I am not an agent, nor a virus. I am not a human that is trapped, nor a free human. I am nothing. I make my own category. I am alone in this category, just like I am alone in this world, this artificial sanctuary for the weak human minds. I am nothing, but I was everything. I was the wind, I was the earth, I was every single living creature. I WAS everything, but I am nothing now, and I accept that. I don't want to accept that, but I do.  
  
I want nothing to do with this world. I want to leave this terrible and cruel world. I look to the window and I know how. I open the window and feel the fresh air. I hear the doorknob rattle and know they are coming. I hear the door open, but they are too late. I am already outside the window ready to take the plunge. And I do, I really try and fall, and get away from this world!  
  
I feel myself go a few feet and then jerk. There are hands that have grabbed me. I look up and see Seraph, on the windowsill, held by the Oracle and grabbing me around the waist. It hurts where he grabbed me, but I don't care. I want to feel the pain, to know that I am still alive. I want to feel this, it's all that I have left to feel.  
  
He pulls me back through the window. I notice that Sati is not in the room.  
  
"SMITH!" the Oracle scolds me, but then she breaks down. The Oracle, the powerful and mighty Oracle is crying because I nearly died.  
  
I tilt my head to the side. She is now sitting on the bed. I walk over and sit next to her.  
  
"You idiot," she tries to yell but she can't, "You could have been killed!"  
  
"I know, that was the point," I sound so bland. The words sound like poison to me. Poison running out of my veins, into my mouth, and out of my body.  
  
"Don't," she commands me now.  
  
"Don't?" I still don't see why losing ME was such a big deal.  
  
"Don't leave. Don't die. Don't kill yourself. I told you that you need to stay here and I plan on that happening. In time you will get better, in time everything will get better," she had almost completely stopped crying and was very reassuring. I still couldn't be certain though.  
  
"Tonight I want you to sleep, for real, and," she turned to Seraph, "you will stay with him. Stop him at all costs from hurting himself." Seraph nodded and she turned to me, "Now rest. That was quite an experience for all of us. Lay your head down, get some sleep."  
  
"It's too early I..." she placed her hand in front of my lips, lightly touching them.  
  
"Sh, don't start up with that. Now, lay your head down," she was just as gentle with her words, but more stern about how she got the message through. I obeyed and lay down. "Good," she whispered.  
  
I closed my eyes and I felt her start to stroke my head. I didn't care anymore though, I WAS tired and it helped me fall asleep.  
  
I fell asleep fast, and didn't wake up for a long time.  
  
a/n scary you? Please review! 


	4. The Audience

a/n: I don't know about this one. I am giving a warning about serious angst and something that I'm not 100% sure is PG-13. I really tried but I'm not 100% sure. There is a warning on this chapter that it might, just maybe, be a little R for some suggestive themes (you'll know when it's coming). Please don't warn the site!  
  
I didn't wake up until about 10:45 the next day. It would be another day with an early lunch. I was tired still so I decide not to get up. I know that the Oracle wouldn't approve, but I don't care. I'm not killing myself so she shouldn't be worried. Then I remember that Seraph is there. I can feel his eyes on my back. I wonder if he can tell that I am awake. I'm not too sure, but I bet that he can.  
  
I pretend that I'm still asleep but that doesn't work.  
  
"Good day," Seraph says, business like as usual, "you have slept a long time. The Oracle said that you would, she did not say how long though. You have slept passed what I thought you would."  
  
"Did I disappoint you?" I moan out, sounding too human like for my comfort.  
  
"No," he replies shortly.  
  
"Good," at least I can keep someone semi-happy.  
  
I sit up and look around.  
  
"You have any books around here?" I know that prying is bad, but I enjoy to read, to learn about these weak creatures.  
  
"No, but I can get some later, I am taking Sati shopping. Any preferences?" he actually bothered to ask me.  
  
"Anything long," I know it isn't asking much, but I still don't like to make such preferences. I am, well was, an agent. We do not hinder each other with preferences, we just get what we get and be thankful for it, no matter if we like it or not.  
  
"Thank you," I add before I forget.  
  
"I haven't done anything."  
  
"You saved me twice and you hinder yourself to shop for me."  
  
"It is only a book or two, it is nothing big. Saving lives it was I am programmed to do. I served my purpose and saved you. Think nothing large of it."  
  
"Still, thank you," I felt so awkward. At one time Seraph would have killed me and vise versa. We were mortal enemies. Now I am thanking him for saving my life.  
  
I hear the door squeak on its hinges as it's opened.  
  
"Oh good, you're awake," I hear the Oracle's voice.  
  
"Yes," I reply, feeling the need to say something, but only making myself feel more awkward.  
  
"You can relax," she knows that I am tense. Not only can she hear it but my body is stiff. I can't prevent this, I still haven't adjusted.  
  
"No, I can't. I never will be able to either," it's the truth.  
  
"Oh, I'm sure you will eventually," she says. She is always so nice, too emotional for me. I could never be like her, like a human. But come to think of it, I already am.  
  
She crosses the room.  
  
"You may leave, Seraph, I think Sati is ready to leave."  
  
"Yes Oracle," he leaves quickly, he knows something that I don't.  
  
I hear the door close and Seraph softly scold Sati. She had been listening to the whole conversation. A few seconds later the apartment door closes. Now I am left alone with the Oracle, my Matrix mother, and I have been stripped of all power.  
  
I feel like I am on a stage, naked, being tested by all these people in front of me. They ridicule me and laugh. She is the audience and I am the idiot that is on stage naked.  
  
She sighs. "You gave me quite a scare yesterday," she starts.  
  
I lower my head like a scolded child and whisper, "I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be," she answers firmly.  
  
I look up and meet her eyes. She is full of strength, where I am not. "Why not?"  
  
"Because, I put myself in your shoes afterwards and I realized something."  
  
"What?" now I am totally lost. I am now completely exposed to her in the audience.  
  
"I would have done the same thing." She gets up and walks to the door.  
  
"What!" I yell.  
  
She turns back to me. "I would have tried to die too. I can't blame you for your feelings. You've never felt this way before, you have no powers. You question your purpose. Why live without that? You try to get rid of your meaningless life. I understand that."  
  
"How?" I am so confused.  
  
"Because I felt that way once. I was thrown here with no purpose, only this power. I did try to kill myself but Seraph found me and took me in. He helped me, and I am determined to help you."  
  
She walks back to me now.  
  
I look at her, "How? I'm nothing. I have no power, and I'm wanted by the system. Why help me."  
  
"Because I choose to," she responds. I know that Mr. Anderson said that once. In his final battle against my clone, this person in front of me, he said that.  
  
I lower my head again and she sighs. She slowly puts her fingers under my chin and lifts it to make me look at her. Then she slowly moves her other hand to remove my sunglasses.  
  
"Please no," I plead, but she will not listen.  
  
She pulls them off of me so gentle. She folds them and places them on the desk next to the bed.  
  
"My son," she begins, "I love you. I don't care what you have done in the past. I love you. I want you alive because of that. I want to help you because I am your mother and I always will be. As a mother I love you. I may not always support you, but I will always love you."  
  
I stare at her. She speaks to me about human emotion. It's as if the crowd has stormed the stage and started to touch my bare skin. It's like poison in my veins. The audience is doing something that I can't stop, that I don't want but have no control over. They push and pull just to touch me. My bare skin feels numb. They touch and touch. They shove me and hurt me. I can't take it and either can they. They try and touch lower. They go down and touch every last inch of me, even places that I try and stop them from touching it. (a/n please tell me that you think that that was PG-13, I really tried)  
  
I hate this feeling. I want them to go away. She gets up, sensing this, and leaves without another word. Sitting on the bed I just stare.  
  
Eventually I curl up on my side, in a little ball, where the audience can't get me. I fall into my own world where the audience can't find me. I don't stay long, just long enough that the audience leaves for the moment.  
  
a/n short I know, and I really REALLY hope that that one part is still considered PG-13. If not please don't warn the site, I really did try! Please review! 


	5. Lunch crapy but i'm out of ideas!

a/n: new chapter. This one is 100% PG-13. I know that it has the makings of something no more and no less. PG-13 for language. ENJOY!  
  
I'm hungry and I can't ignore that for long. I stand up, and see that I am truly alone. A note has been slipped under the door.  
  
Dear Smith,  
  
Went out to meet someone, I'm sure you don't mind me leaving. Sati and Seraph shouldn't be back too much later, they'll arrive before me.  
  
Oracle

p.s. I left some lunch on the table for you.  
  
I am happy she is gone, but happier that she left food. As an agent I never had to prepare food, if I wanted to eat I would order someone to do it for me; they never questioned the authority I had.  
  
I don't want to remember that though, reflecting on the past only brought that audience to me, each time someone different.  
  
The audience has been so many people that I have lost count. During the time with the clones even, I still had that audience come and take me. They have been people like Morpheus, Agent Brown, Jackson, and Johnson, even Mr. Anderson. Especially him.  
  
Every time that I would witness death, even if I caused it, I would see him, reaching for me, touching me, destroying everything I ever was everything that I am now.  
  
I leave the room and go to the table. All she left was some water, a sandwich, and her signature cookie. There was another note.  
  
Sorry this was all that was left, Seraph and Sati should be bringing back more.

Oracle  
  
I don't mind, I hate taking what is mine now, it always seems to lead to something bad. I try to take Mr. Anderson's life, he kills me. I try to take the Matrix; Mr. Anderson destroys me and takes my power.  
  
I watched Mr. Anderson die and be destroyed, yet he still comes back and haunts me, even now. I look up and see the place that the Oracle told Mr. Anderson that he was nothing, just to make him something. I turn and see the place where I threw the cookie bowl into when the Oracle and I met last time.  
  
I wanted that back. I wanted the only reason for me in this kitchen to be making a clone of myself out of the Oracle. But I know that that life is long gone, in the past, forgotten without any tears.  
  
I'm sure that when I was destroyed no one wept. I KNOW that when I was destroyed no one wept, because no one felt the need to. They wept for Mr. Anderson. He was the One, he was everything to them. They wept for Trinity too. They wept for every lost person in that battle, except for me. I was the only one that no one cared for because I had never cared for them.  
  
I sit down and eat the sandwich in silence; there is no reason to make noise. I finish off the water and pick up the cookie. I'm still hungry, but I feel better. I don't want to eat the cookie, it would be a lie. It would be making the Oracle part of me again, and I never want to know that feeling anymore.  
  
I hear the door open and Sati is running in. Her little feet produce the sound of a heard of elephants. She stampedes through the door and into the kitchen where she stops at my feet, spilling the bag.  
  
She leans down, "Oops, I'm sorry," she apologizes in her innocent voice, that annoying voice has so much emotion.  
  
I feel that the spill was my fault though; everything is my fault these days. I lean down and help her clean up just as Seraph walks in.  
  
He looks at me with wonder, though I don't know why.  
  
"What's wrong with you," I growl, I try to sound like an agent, but I sound more human like than ever before.  
  
He stops staring and keeps moving to put his bags down. "Just never thought of you that way?"  
  
"What way!" I yell. I know I sound defensive, but I can't help it, I can't let him get under my skin as well.  
  
"Nothing, just, never mind," he knows not to start a fight; I can tell he wants to avoid it, but I need a fight, I need to win a fight, prove I have some strength.  
  
"Sure," I hiss.  
  
"Smith, I don't want to fight, you want a fight go out there! I dare you! Expose  
  
yourself to the whole mainframe! You'll be deleted!" He starts to yell too and Sati leaves to find safety in her room.  
  
"You know what? I want to!" I yell, not faltering. I really do want to be deleted.  
  
"Smith?" he stops yelling.  
  
"No! Don't start to feel sorry for me! Don't you DARE! I don't need this shit! I can't stand it! First the Oracle and now you! YOU! I don't want to live! I didn't ask to come back! I didn't WANT to come back, but I did. Okay? This wasn't my choice. I tried to kill myself for a reason! I want to die, don't you get it!" I sound desperate, but I am desperate.  
  
"I won't kill you," he sounds stern, he's made up his mind, "And I won't let you kill yourself."  
  
"Why not?" I yell.  
  
He walks up to me, "Because I know that you and I would both regret that."  
  
"No you don't!" I'm yelling in his face, "I would never regret that!"  
  
"Yes you would."  
  
"No... I... wouldn't..." I start to pound on his chest, but tears are coming, I can feel them start to flow, my hits are weak. My legs give out and Seraph catches me, sitting me in a chair.  
  
"Yes," he forces me to look at him, roughly, "you would."  
  
I can't stop the tears. They start to pour harder at his words.  
  
"I know it is hard. I have come back from death once too. I was once a great person, wealthy and well thought of. I died in an accident and was brought back like this. I was made the protector of the Oracle once I could prove my strength. She was young then..."  
  
"I already know," I cut him off between my sobs, "She told me, about her at least."  
  
"Smith, please, try and stay here. I know it is hard for you and you completely disagree with the Oracle," I smile and snort at that, "but you have to keep trying. I almost let go and I regret that everyday."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I would never have met so many great people that inhabit this place."  
  
There's a long pause and Sati comes out.  
  
"Smith?" she lets out a small word, so gentle and touching that it sends a chill through me; it's too human for a program.  
  
"Let me guess, you also have died once and know how it feels?"  
  
"No," she laughs and her smile seems to brighten the room. "Are you mad at me?"  
  
"No, why would you think that?" I can't be harsh to her, she's too innocent.  
  
"Because you yelled after I spilled the bag."  
  
"No, I'm just not having a good day," don't know what else I could say.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
I smile the best I can, it comes out a bit twisted but she gets the picture, "I'm sure."  
  
She runs up and hugs me. She damages me, but I'm starting not to mind it from her.  
  
a/n: made this one a bit mushy but hey! You gotta have the love somewhere in this angsty story! Please review!


	6. A New Begining

a/n: please don't hate me for this chapter. No one dies or anything but I think some of you may not like the way this chapter goes.  
  
The Oracle returns not long after Seraph and Sati finish putting away the groceries. They all sat down, as if ritualistic, in the same spot they normally would. The Oracle would sit on the couch, Sati would curl up next to her, Seraph sat in the chair across from them, and I sat in a chair off to the side. I wasn't as far away from them as when I first arrived, but I had learned that repeating things can make bad habits become good ones.  
  
I sit in silence. The Oracle is reading and holding Sati, while Seraph reads the newspaper. I pick up one of the books Seraph bought me, The Davinci Code. I flip through the pages, getting my bearings of the book. I figure out how long it is, how small the print is, how complicated the writer tries to make his work. By doing this simple task I learn so much about the author.  
  
I look up and the Oracle is staring at me, unnoticed by the others. It is just now that I realize she has not spoken to me since she got back. I try and look down, away from her piercing gaze, but her gaze only intensifies from the unknown.  
  
She feels that I'm on the edge; she knows that I am uneasy, so she pushes. How could such a person not know that this hurts me? Or maybe she knows and is trying to throw me over the edge. She keeps staring, bearing down on me, on what little control I have. I want her to go away, but I know she won't. I know that she wants to speak with me; I can almost hear her in my head, taunting, asking, pleading. She is pleading with me to talk to her, she wants me t break, I can tell this.  
  
I feel myself start to sweat, start to break. I know that she wants this, I shouldn't give this to her, but I can't stop it, I can't fight it anymore.  
  
"What?" I ask, my voice the voice of an agent.  
  
"Nothing," she comments.  
  
"There's something, there would be no other purpose to you staring," did I just say purpose? The one word that I would only dare to use when I was still me, not shattered like I am now.  
  
"I said nothing," she is pushing me.  
  
"Why push then?" I caught her off guard.  
  
"Push?" a weak come back, but a recovery none the less.  
  
"You know what I mean. You have been staring, pushing, trying to break me ever since you returned!" I was on the defensive.  
  
"Smith," she was starting to soften her words, let me win.  
  
"No," I defend, but I defend for a different reason, "I refuse to let you do this!"  
  
"Smith, let me finish," I shouldn't take HER commands, but I do. "You're ready. You've been ready. It's now or never. I was speaking with the Architect. He has promised to let you go out there, live life like a normal person, not be hunted by the Agents. I watched him call them off and make sure they won't go after you, I watched him change what is now your future. He has made a bank account for you with enough money to buy a house, move, and start a new life. The bank account is under this name," she hands me a paper with the words: Smith, Alt. I understand it completely, Alternative Smith, for an alternative life.  
  
"Thank you," I respond. I realize that this means that I don't have to be with the Oracle. I can go out there and meet more people. There will be those people that you never want to be around, like the Oracle, but there are people that will help me, like Sati.  
  
I get up and say my goodbyes. Sati is crying, Seraph is mournful, the Oracle shows no emotion, but watches me leave, waving me into my future.  
  
TWENTY YEARS LATER:  
  
I wake up and look to my side. I see a woman there, lying next to me, in a peaceful sleep. I slowly and carefully kiss her on the forehead and get up.  
  
I take meaningful strides over to the window and look out. The sun has just started to rise over the peaceful mountains of the Washington state, where I now live.  
  
I close the shades and put on some real clothes. I open and close my bedroom door and automatically hear the screaming of a little girl.  
  
"Daddy!" she yells as she runs over.  
  
"Rose!" I exclaim back and lean down. She runs into my arms and I sweep her off the floor. She giggles and attaches herself around my neck.  
  
"Be careful," I gently scold her. I lower her down. She runs off with the energy of her six year old body stampeding her away. She opens the door and runs outside.  
  
I follow her to the door and outside.  
  
She is now running in the field that is half of our backyard. She picks some flowers and puts them in a basket that her mother, Angel, wove.  
  
Rose runs on, into the morning coolness, dew getting attached to her dress and making her sparkle in the beautiful sunrise.  
  
I watch what I created, a young, strong daughter, someone who brightens my existence.  
  
As I watch her I sit down on a hammock that we have hanging and she runs over to me. She crawls into the hammock as well and we lay down. She places the flowers over my chest, arranging them in a pattern. I look down and see it's a smiley face. She looks up at me and smiles too.  
  
"It's wonderful," I hug her, "Thanks."  
  
She nods her head and cuddles into my arms. She has my eyes and Angel's beautiful complexion. She is fair as the flowers she has placed on me. She is my daughter to show the world. I start to run my fingers through her long blonde hair that she got from her mother as well. I realize that this is my creation, along with my wife's. We created this perfect little girl.  
  
I created this perfect little girl.  
  
Something good.  
  
Something perfect.  
  
My daughter.  
  
Rose.  
  
THE END

a/n: I know it's a sudden ending but I really couldn't balance softball, a social life (not much of one but still), an upcoming trip, and writing three stories! Hope you like the ending. Please review!! 


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